Rap
*A line from my brother’s and his friend’s rap: “Just because of our pigment, they need all our background info”*
Mus: Get it Zohra? Because he’s black and I’m brown.
Me: I get it. But you’re not brown.
Mus: Okay fine. Peanut butter.
Marriage talk
*Anonymous girl telling me about a guy who asked for her hand*
Anonymous: Zohra, I haven’t told you the craziest part.
Me: Oh my God. Don’t tell me he’s your cousin.
Gym
Me: I really didn’t feel like going to the gym today. When’s the last time you went to the gym Runa?
Runa: This morning.
Me: You’re lying aren’t you?
Runa: Yeah.
Tuition
Venus: You just paid like $50,000 to get a tiny piece of paper from your school.
Me: You know Hogwarts doesn’t even charge their students. Look at how awesome they are.
*silence*
Venus: Are we really having this conversation?
Baby Toys
*Runa took a nap on my bed, fully-clothed and still even had her shoes on. Suddenly she woke up, looked around her and eyes the toy blocks on my vanity that Shab had left earlier that night*
Runa: Hey. Shab left some of Éssa’s blocks in your room.
Me: I know. She didn’t see them while cleaning them up because I……was playing with them.
People who judge people who eat ramen noodles dont have taste buds.
Aiya Van Kooten everyone
When Aiya Van Kooten stood face-to-face with a burglar in her bedroom, her left eye twitched, then she went into “predator mode”.
“I screamed at him… jumped off my chair, leaped over my bed and sprinted after him down the stairs,” she said.
http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/crime/8626910/Predator-mode-scares-off-burglars
This is the best story of my life
“Although she was the only one home, Van Kooten said she had no regard for her safety - instead, she said she was just overwhelmed with “rage“….. ummmmm Hero!!!
Haha, badass Muslim woman. Love it!!!
This lady is so awesome. She lives with her grandma and was studying and had a towel on her head and no shoes but she chased them out of her garden, kicked one up the arse as he climbed a fence, they dropped a camera and laptop, she flagged down a passing driver to help her continue the pursuit, and it turned out he was ex-military, and they finally caught one of them in a park and pinned him as the police arrived. Now she’s going to visit the burglar in prison for the next few months to help with his rehabilitation.
So in summary:
This lady doesn’t just defend her home and loved ones, she will hunt you down, team up with other skilled individuals, get you put away, and then teach you the consequences of your actions until you’re a valuable member of society once more.
Seriously she’s a frigging superhero.
literal hero
Oh my God. My heart…it hurts. Too much cuteness.
When I was little, my parents made me massage their back like this…

“ Don’t mistake my kindness for weakness. I am kind to everyone, but when someone is unkind to me, weak is not what you are going to remember about me.
Top Comment on this video: That’s enough internet for today.
I’m gonna have to agree O.o

